Choosing the correct home for your parent or loved one can feel overwhelming. Not only do you have to deal with their changing condition but you also have to find the right place to care for them. You may be the only family member suitable for the task or you may be looking for a friend who desperately needs care. There are many things you can do to manage the stress you feel while looking for the right solution for your loved one.
Here are a few strategies for managing the stress during this transition:
- Take One Step At A Time: You cannot do it all at once. Put together a schedule and follow it as closely as possible. Look online and ask your friends or colleagues for advice on good care facilities. See how they may fit with your loved one’s needs and schedule a tour. By breaking this search into smaller steps, and giving yourself plenty of time, you will make this challenging job quite a bit easier.
- Focus On The One Who Needs Care: This is a good way to help you see clearly what you need to do. Keeping your focus on the care needs of your loved one can make it easier work past any possible barriers and get on with the job of choosing the correct facility. Think of how they are going to fit in and what level of care they will need. This will help you decide on the right home. After all you are doing all of this for them.
- Get Help: If possible do not take on the burden all by yourself. Involve other family members or friends you can trust. Sharing the decision makes it easier and an extra pair of eyes can only help when taking a look at all a facility has to offer. Others may see things you cannot and they may be a big help in doing research or even doing a tour or two.
- This Is A Process: You are not the first person to have to find the right place for your loved one. Talk to other people who have been through similar searches about what process they used to help them decide on the right place. Talk with the staff at the facilities you visit about what they would look for. Then lay out a process that works best for you. There are plenty of homes out there, so do what you need to do to get your loved one into the right place. Do not let the process run you, take charge from the beginning and it will be an easier time for you.
- Keep The Loved One Out Of It: Until you are ready with a few viable alternatives, keep your parent or loved one out of the process. When you have a final list drawn up, then lay out the choices for your loved one and listen to what they have to say. Arrange visits to a few select facilities, as it will be easier for them and you to make a decision when the choice is narrowed down.
- Trust your gut: If something doesn’t feel right then it probably isn’t. If a home gives you a bad feeling, especially after a second visit, then drop it from the list. Use your intelligence to draw up a shortlist but use your intuition to discard any unsuitable candidates. By going with a place that doesn’t match your gut feeling you will only be increasing your stress levels. You will find yourself waiting for something to go wrong.
- Stress is unavoidable: There will be stressful moments during this process. The idea is to reduce the stress as much as possible. Recognizing that there will be stress involved, and figuring out a strategy for handling it, will make it easier for you to manage during this process. Identifying possible stressful areas in advance, such as organizing home tours, can help to reduce the overall stress levels.
Stress will be a factor when deciding on a care home. Utilize these strategies so that it doesn’t take over the process. W have been through this with many care givers, so please give us a call and see how we can help take some of the stress out of this challenging time.